Chapter 35: Things Get Really Dire
Joggers! The first Sign of the End o' The Universe!
The Sage of Endless Axioms spake unto Havoc "Lo, the coming of the Runners Without Purpose is a Sign that the End is Nigh."
The Great Pterodactyl awoke from an unexpected nap, during which he dreamed some entity called the phone company had disconnected his telephone for no apparent reason. But the dream ended pleasantly as he convinced them to reconnect the device.
Looking about the nest atop his Great Hideaway, Ptero noticed tiny cracks seamed the two Great Eggs. The Eggs were hatching!!
The second Sign of the End o' The Universe!
"Soon they shall venture unto the star-grass and behold the Lemmings of MU. Then shall there be Stock Markets. And therefrom shall proceed CEOs, Leveraged Buyouts, Insider Tradering, Banking Scandals, Monopolistic Practices, and MultiNational PoliCorps. And in those hours shall Prophets foresee the Great Loss. And the MultiCorps shall bring forth Lobbyists, and Lobbyists shall bring forth Government."
"Then Shall the Doom of Creation be Truly Sealed."
And Some of the Lemmings began to consider how they might Jump without leaving their current Positions.
In the game room at the Abbey, Those lemmings were still playing Canasta. "Hey! Who put all these tarot Death cards in the deck?"
In Pterroland, a shell cracked open just enough to permit a metallic pincer to come out...
And some of the Lemmings in Pterroland climbed up to the Shell and tried to jump off the metallic Pincer. Some fell off the pincer INTO the egg.
"Wheeeeee!" *glomph* "Ack! Ptoo! Ptoo!"
In the Land of Eed, the teenagers ran about in confusion, for the place was a mess and Donnar Eed might return and then they'd be in Big Trouble..
"Donnar Eed asked me to bring you . . ." began Bifr, tripping over the Threshold of Death. Scrubbing Bubba dived for the lemming Casserole yet again, but slipped upon the Putrefied Remains and fell headfirst into the Casserole, whose contents splattered onto The Overlord of Death, Putrefied Remains and Generally Nasty Smells, PhD (Under New Management).