Chapter 25: A Dispirited Guest

"M-miss Eed?" a timid voice stuttered.


There before Donnar Eed was a rather ragged, snaggle-toothed, smeared and clumsy looking Bifr.

"H-hello. Um, I'm not here to sell anything. I just, uh, I just wanted you to know, that I'm very, very sorry for what I did to your lovely giant world. Lord Death told me to stay away from here, and I... it was an accident. You have to believe that. I promise, I'll never do it again. I'll even work for you, pay of my debt, you know. Anything I can do to help, you just name it..."

"Oh, you poor dear! Have a seat here at the kitchen table." Donnar Eed puts a plate of warm chocolate chip cookies and a tall glass of cold milk in front of the Bifr. "You know," she said in a sympathetic and slightly condescending attitude, "we all make mistakes. In fact, what you did actually helped. Now everybody is all together on one Huge World, with their own land to do what ever they want. And now we can easily visit each other." D.E. continued to comfort the timid Bifr.

"You know, there is something you can do for me." The Bifr's eyes lit up. "Take this lemming casserole to Overlord Death for me. Thank-you"

The bifr (who accidentally spilled his milk getting up, and apologized profusely before being assured that it was all right) took the casserole in both hands, and said "Oh, thank you Ms. Eed! You've been so kind, and all I've been is trouble... I swear, I'll never..."

The bifr raised one hand in oath, and promptly dropped the casserole, which splattered all over the floor. On the verge of a fit of embarrassment, he sputtered "Oh, oh gees, I'm sorry, I'll clean it up, sorry..."

And the Bifr concentrated. On the floor, surrounding the mess appeared numerous half-spherical, feeler-bottomed creatures with eyes. "Well," exclaimed the Bifr, "What are you waiting for? You're scrubbing bubbles! Scrub up this mess!"

"Whee!" the Scrubbing Bubbles exclaimed, circling in ever widening circles, and multiplying, as they went. But the bubbles failed to actually clean anything. Rather, they spread a dirty, slimy foam around all over the place wherever they went. Some got in Donnar Eed's eye, and the Bifr actually fell down and was coated.

Very soon, the bubbles had covered the huge world in dirty, slimy foam, and had begun to drift off into space in innumerable droves, to spread their peculiar plague to many other worlds.

The Bifr just cringed in a puddle of foam, embarrassed.

"I am beginning," said Donnar Eed, primly wiping a dollop of scum from her eye, "to suspect I've heard of you, my young bifr."

Word that Donnar Eed had been baking LEMMINGS into casseroles spread as fast as the scrubbing bubbles! Lemmings of both New and Old vintages bounced up to the Great Pterodactyl and Pterri and pleaded "Please, oh powerful ones! Please protect us! Save us from becoming a dandy side dish!"