Chapter 19: Supernature Abhors a Vacuum
Though Salk had to admit the universe's layout was a bit more organized now with only one world, he was not too sure about Donnar Eed's vacuum thing. He considered filing a lawsuit, but realized this would be futile without courts, lawyers, governments, and so forth, which he can't really create well since they were not in his Sphere.
Well, perhaps Crow could steal it...
"Caw!" said Crow, in salutation, landing on the sidelines of a hockey game which Salk was watching with some amusement. Crow watched too, and was mightily amused.
"Some game you've got here, Salk. Say, I heard you're thinking about stealing something. Not clear on what, but that's my kinda gig. What's yours, by the way?
Anyway, do you have a plan? I know we could just zip on over in broad eternity-light, but that's really not very sneaky. Really, any ideas at all will do; I'm sure I can come up with something."
Salk replied to Crow, "Er, yeh, I was talking about relieving D.E. of her vacuum thingy. You know, tired of stuff getting sucked and spewed all the time. Anyway, you're the sneaky one; I was hopin you'd have some ideas..."
The air held an expectant charge as Salk awaited Crow's response.
The Overlord of Death, Putrefied Remains and Generally Nasty Smells considered the request of the Lord of Incompetence, then said unto him
"No, I *do not* need your ineptitude! I especially do not want you to do anything for Me! Like destroy the Great World in which I have no domain to call My own. For, if you were to do so, as we all know, the end of The First Age will come to an end. No, I do not want you to do that!"
All the while, The Overlord of Death, PhD, secretly hoped that his ploy would come to fruition through the ineptitude of the Lord of Incompetence to obey his desire for him not to do what he just said.
Lord Incompetence shrugged, indifferent, upon hearing this from the lord of death.
"Ok. If that's the way you want it, M'lord. I'll stay as far away from the great world as possible. I sure wouldn't want anything to happen to the great world either, and admire your selflessness in wanting it to survive, even if you have no place there. And your honesty in telling me the truth."
Oboy, was the OoD,PRaGNS in for a Potential Treat! A close inspection of the sacred scripture in the Book of Donnar Eed, chapter 166726, reveals: "She sucked up all the world she was standing on plus all the other duplicate worlds, and out came Giant World," which indicates that the Overlord of Death's world still remained. Incompetence had been transported to another planet entirely. On the Great World, several mortals miraculously avoided tripping over things..
Yet the The Overlord of Death, Putrefied Remains and Generally Nasty Smells was extremely jealous that there is no Deathland on Giant World with all sorts of deadly rides and little balloons to hand out, which would be blown up by the flatulent lemmings.
So Incompetence wandered off. On the way, however, he got lost. Quite lost. Utterly and totally lost. Now, as it so happened, all of the newly generated bosons, not yet having well learned their job, and congregating in inordinate numbers around the Great Planet, which Incompetence was mistakenly wandering very near to, jumped the gun, and started to drag Incompetence toward the planet.
By the time Incompetence had discovered what they were doing, he gasped. "No!" he cried. "I have given my word to death that I will not visit or harass the Great World!" And so saying, he began to coruscate with the tremendous energies of annihilation any of the bifrs was able to generate. As they peaked, he fired them at the bosons.
But he missed. And, to his horror, the bolt went shrieking through empty space towards the Great Planet. Incompetence tried to stop it, but he failed! He watched in terror as tremendous, unstoppable annihilative energies enveloped the great planet!!!
Thus came to a close what was later known as the Good Old Days.
More was yet to come as Mr. Death began to plot once again.......